Looks fine to me, but from a marketing point of view it's more about the message, not so much about how you write the message. That being said, of course a description needs to be legible and worded in a way that appeals to your target market.
For example, if you are selling ice creams to kids, then drop the big words and use lots of fun words to add colour and interest. If you are selling something to a chef, put the big words back in, but lean strongly towards culinary terms to not only make it more interesting to the buyer, but to give them confidence that you're a seller that knows your stuff!
OK , that's the general idea of writing good marketing copy.
I can see a few areas where you could break your description into a few more paragraphs and focus on elaberating certain features that would bulk out your description somewhat if you really wanted to.
No one every idn't buy a product because there was too much information about it, but plenty of sales can be lost because of too much information when the right information isn't in the right spot!
If you ever do decide to bulk out your descriptions, treat them like a Press Release. A well laid Press Release will always highlight the important information within the first paragraph.
That is done because you have to get the editors attention asap, or risk them binning it because they simply don't have the time to read through the complete document.
Informative descriptions are great, they can save you a lot of time answering questions, and save your customers the frustration from having to ask what they believe you should have included in the first place.
Just summarize your description right at the start, that's the hook you need to set. That's what get's the customers attention, from there, a customer can then read what ever information it is they require so long as your information is well laid out and simple for them to navigate.
Just a quick marketing tip on using colour in your copy. Customers respond better to a dark grey text, but nothing less that 80% black. Dark grey is actually easier on the eyes that a strong black, and has been found to encourage customers to read more.
The longer you can hold a customers attention, the higher your chances are of converting the sale.
Black itself is great for headers, especially bold black. It commands the buyers attention as the eye is automatically drawn to it, so it's the perfect choice to set the platform.
If you are wanting to display a professional image, the use of colour fonts should be kept to a minimum. Too much colour can cause confusion as the colours all fight to attract the customers attention, and that can lead to your description being quite hard to read.
For a professional layout, keep your font size down to 10 or 11, making the font size too big leads to it reading like a Dick and Jane book for under 5 year olds.
It's really good that you are actually focusing on this area. Selling is about presentation of a product, no matter what the product is, and when you are talking about online sales, well presented, informative copy is a massive part of the presentation. The other of course are the images you present, so don't over look that aspect of the over all presentation.